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EDDARD
#ch 第四十五章 艾德
Pain is a gift from the gods, Lord Eddard," Grand Maester Pycelle told him. "It means the bone is knitting, the flesh healing itself. Be thankful."
“艾德大人,痛觉是天上诸神的恩赐啊,”派席尔大学士告诉他,“这代表骨头正在逐渐接合,伤口也快要痊愈,您该心存感激才是。”
"I will be thankful when my leg stops throbbing."
“等何时我脚不痛了,再来感激也不迟。”
Pycelle set a stoppered flask on the table by the bed. "The milk of the poppy, for when the pain grows too onerous."
派席尔把塞上瓶盖的药罐放在床边的桌上。“这是罂粟花奶,痛得太厉害的时候喝。”
"I sleep too much already."
“我已经睡得太多。”
"Sleep is the great healer."
“睡眠是最好的医生。”
"I had hoped that was you."
“我以为好医生是你。”
Pycelle smiled wanly. "It is good to see you in such a fierce humor, my lord." He leaned close and lowered his voice. "There was a raven this morning, a letter for the queen from her lord father. I thought you had best know."
派席尔满脸倦容地微笑。“大人,很高兴看到您还这么幽默。”他靠过来低声说,“今天早上来了只渡鸦,带来王后她父亲大人的信。我想最好让您知道。”
"Dark wings, dark words," Ned said grimly. "What of it?"
“黑色的翅膀,黑色的消息。”奈德阴沉地说:“信上怎么说?”
"Lord Tywin is greatly wroth about the men you sent after Ser Gregor Clegane," the maester confided. "I feared he would be. You will recall, I said as much in council."
“泰温大人对您派人去逮捕格雷果•克里冈一事极为愤慨。”大学士悄声对他说,“这正好印证我的担心,您应该记得,当初我在朝廷上也提醒过您。”
"Let him be wroth," Ned said. Every time his leg throbbed, he remembered Jaime Lannister’s smile, and Jory dead in his arms. "Let him write all the letters to the queen he likes. Lord Beric rides beneath the king’s own banner. If Lord Tywin attempts to interfere with the king’s justice, he will have Robert to answer to. The only thing His Grace enjoys more than hunting is making war on lords who defy him."
“让他去愤慨。”奈德说。每当他脚伤抽痛,他便会想起詹姆•兰尼斯特的微笑,以及乔里死在他怀中的景况。“他爱写什么给王后是他的事。贝里伯爵打的是国王的旗号,执行的是国王的律法,要是泰温大人敢插手干预,那他就得向劳勃负责。如果说这世上还有什么比打猎更能吸引陛下,莫过于率军讨伐违抗命令的臣下了。”
Pycelle pulled back, his maester’s chain jangling. "As you say. I shall visit again on the morrow." The old man hurriedly gathered up his things and took his leave. Ned had little doubt that he was bound straight for the royal apartments, to whisper at the queen. I thought you had best know, indeed?.?.?.?as if Cersei had not instructed him to pass along her father’s threats. He hoped his response rattled those perfect teeth of hers. Ned was not near as confident of Robert as he pretended, but there was no reason Cersei need know that.
派席尔抽回身子,脖子上的锁链吭啷作响。“如您所言。我明天再来看看。”老人收拾东西很快离去。奈德想也知道他八成会直奔王家居室,把他的反应通报王后。好个“我想最好让您知道”……说得一副瑟曦没有特别吩咐他把她父亲的恐吓说出来似的。他希望自己的回答能让她咬牙切齿。实际上奈德对劳勃并不如他表面上显示的那么有信心,但没必要让瑟曦知道。
When Pycelle was gone, Ned called for a cup of honeyed wine. That clouded the mind as well, yet not as badly. He needed to be able to think. A thousand times, he asked himself what Jon Arryn might have done, had he lived long enough to act on what he’d learned. Or perhaps he had acted, and died for it.
派席尔走后,奈德要来一杯掺蜂蜜的酒。这东西喝了同样会干扰神臹,却没那么严重。他必须保持思绪明晰。他问过自己一千辫:假如琼恩•艾林得知真相后没被人害死,他接下来会采取什么行动?话说回来,说不定他采取过行动,却因此而丧命。
It was queer how sometimes a child’s innocent eyes can see things that grown men are blind to. Someday, when Sansa was grown, he would have to tell her how she had made it all come clear for him. He’s not the least bit like that old drunken king, she had declared, angry and unknowing, and the simple truth of it had twisted inside him, cold as death. This was the sword that killed Jon Arryn, Ned thought then, and it will kill Robert as well, a slower death but full as certain. Shattered legs may heal in time, but some betrayals fester and poison the soul.
说来奇怪,有时候孩子无知的眼睛,反而能看到成年人视而不见的事实。总有一天,等珊莎长大,他一定要告诉她,她的一句话是如何为他拨开了重重疑云。她在一无所知的情况下,说出“他一点都不像那酒鬼国王”这句气话,单纯的真相顿时在他胸口翻涌,冰冷一如死亡。这就是杀死琼恩•艾林的那把剑,当时奈德便想,这把剑同样也会杀死劳勃,或许比较慢,但绝对是迟早的事。断腿终会愈合,然而某些背叛却会逐渐腐蚀灵魂。
Littlefinger came calling an hour after the Grand Maester had left, clad in a plum-colored doublet with a mockingbird embroidered on the breast in black thread, and a striped cloak of black and white. "I cannot visit long, my lord," he announced. "Lady Tanda expects me to lunch with her. No doubt she will roast me a fatted calf. If it’s near as fatted as her daughter, I’m like to rupture and die. And how is your leg?"
国师离开后不到一小时,小指头身穿胸前用黑线绣有仿声鸟的李子色外衣,披着黑白相间的条纹披风前来造访。“大人,我不能久留,”他进门便说,“坦妲伯爵夫人等着我共进午餐,想必会特地为我烤只肥牛。呵,如果那只牛跟她女儿一样肥,我吃了八成会活活胀死。您的脚可还好?”
"Inflamed and painful, with an itch that is driving me mad."
“又痛又痒,快把我逼疯了。”
Littlefinger lifted an eyebrow. "In future, try not to let any horses fall on it. I would urge you to heal quickly. The realm grows restive. Varys has heard ominous whispers from the west. Freeriders and sellswords have been flocking to Casterly Rock, and not for the thin pleasure of Lord Tywin’s conversation."
小指头抬起一边眉毛。“从今往后,没事别让马压到。我劝你赶紧好起来,国内情势越来越不安定。瓦里斯听到不少从西边传来的坏消息,流浪武士和自由骑手正朝凯岩城蜂拥而去,他们可不是和泰温大人聊天去的。”
"Is there word of the king?" Ned demanded. "Just how long does Robert intend to hunt?"
“国王那边有消息吗?”奈德问,“劳勃到底要打猎到什么时候?”
"Given his preferences, I believe he’d stay in the forest until you and the queen both die of old age," Lord Petyr replied with a faint smile. "Lacking that, I imagine he’ll return as soon as he’s killed something. They found the white hart, it seems?.?.?.?or rather, what remained of it. Some wolves found it first, and left His Grace scarcely more than a hoof and a horn. Robert was in a fury, until he heard talk of some monstrous boar deeper in the forest. Then nothing would do but he must have it. Prince Joffrey returned this morning, with the Royces, Ser Balon Swann, and some twenty others of the party. The rest are still with the king."
“若是依他的意,我想他会待在森林里,等你和王后都老死了才回来。”培提尔浅浅一笑。 “既然这不可能,大概等杀到猎物他就会回来罢。他们找到了那只白鹿……噢,应该说找到了白鹿的残骸。有些狼捷足先登,只留给国王陛下一只鹿蹄和一只鹿角。劳勃气坏了,随后他听说森林深处有只怪物般的大熊,这时怎么也拦不住他啦。乔佛里王子,罗伊斯家的人,巴隆•史文,以及其他二十几号人今早上回来了。其他人陪着国王继续打猎。”
"The Hound?" Ned asked, frowning. Of all the Lannister party, Sandor Clegane was the one who concerned him the most, now that Ser Jaime had fled the city to join his father.
“猎狗呢?”奈德皱眉问。眼下詹姆爵士业已逃出城去和他父亲会师,兰尼斯特家的人里面,就数桑铎•克里冈最教他担心。
"Oh, returned with Joffrey, and went straight to the queen." Littlefinger smiled. "I would have given a hundred silver stags to have been a roach in the rushes when he learned that Lord Beric was off to behead his brother."
“喔,他跟乔佛里一道回来,他们直接奔王后那儿去了。”小指头微笑,“等他知道贝里大人带兵去杀他老哥的时候,我宁可花一百枚银鹿变成草丛里的蟑螂。”
"Even a blind man could see the Hound loathed his brother."
“就算瞎子也看得出猎狗恨透他哥哥。”
"Ah, but Gregor was his to loathe, not yours to kill. Once Dondarrion lops the summit off our Mountain, the Clegane lands and incomes will pass to Sandor, but I wouldn’t hold my water waiting for his thanks, not that one. And now you must forgive me. Lady Tanda awaits with her fatted calves."
“是啊,可是格雷果也只有他能恨,轮不到你杀。待唐德利恩削平魔山的山峰,克里冈家族的领地与税赋自然会传给桑铎,但别奢望他跟你道谢啦,绝对不会。抱歉,我真的该走了,坦妲伯爵夫人和她的肥牛还等着我呢。”
On the way to the door, Lord Petyr spied Grand Maester Malleon’s massive tome on the table and paused to idly flip open the cover. "The Lineages and Histories of the Great Houses of the Seven Kingdoms, With Descriptions of Many High Lords and Noble Ladies and Their Children," he read. "Now there is tedious reading if ever I saw it. A sleeping potion, my lord?"
还没到门边,培提尔瞥见桌上那本梅利恩国师的厚重巨著,便停下来,随意翻开封面。“《七国主要贵族之世家谱系与历史(内附许多关于爵爷夫人和他们子女的描述)》,”他念道,“这可真是我见过的最无聊的东西了。大人,敢情您用这来帮助入眠?”
For a brief moment Ned considered telling him all of it, but there was something in Littlefinger’s japes that irked him. The man was too clever by half, a mocking smile never far from his lips. "Jon Arryn was studying this volume when he was taken sick," Ned said in a careful tone, to see how he might respond.
有那么一瞬间,奈德犹豫要不要把实情告诉他,但小指头的玩笑令他生厌。这家伙老是自以为机灵,那抹促狭的微笑从来不离唇边。“琼恩•艾林生病时读的就是这本书。”奈德谨慎地说,打算试探对方的反应。
And he responded as he always did: with a quip. "In that case," he said, "death must have come as a blessed relief." Lord Petyr Baelish bowed and took his leave.
他果然一如既往地耍了个嘴皮子。“若是这样,”他说,“那死还真算得上解脱。”语毕培提尔•贝里席伯爵鞠躬离去。
Eddard Stark allowed himself a curse. Aside from his own retainers, there was scarcely a man in this city he trusted. Littlefinger had concealed Catelyn and helped Ned in his inquiries, yet his haste to save his own skin when Jaime and his swords had come out of the rain still rankled. Varys was worse. For all his protestations of loyalty, the eunuch knew too much and did too little. Grand Maester Pycelle seemed more Cersei’s creature with every passing day, and Ser Barristan was an old man, and rigid. He would tell Ned to do his duty.
艾德•史塔克容许自己咒骂了一句。除了自己的手下,城里无人可以信任。小指头虽曾帮忙藏匿凯特琳,也协助奈德明查暗访,然而当詹姆和他手下出现时,他那幅急于自保的嘴脸,至今依旧历历如绘。瓦里斯更糟。他成天强调自己忠心耿耿,事实上他知道的太多,真正去做的却太少。派席尔国师越看越像瑟曦的走狗,巴利斯坦爵士则年事已高,又食古不化,多半会告诉奈德管好份内之事即可。
Time was perilously short. The king would return from his hunt soon, and honor would require Ned to go to him with all he had learned. Vayon Poole had arranged for Sansa and Arya to sail on the Wind Witch out of Braavos, three days hence. They would be back at Winterfell before the harvest. Ned could no longer use his concern for their safety to excuse his delay.
时间异常紧迫,待国王游猎归来,出于荣誉,奈德非得向他吐露实情不可。维扬•普尔已经安排好珊莎和艾莉亚三天后搭乘布拉佛斯的风之巫女号离开,奈德再也无法以她们的安危作为自己拖延的借口。
Yet last night he had dreamt of Rhaegar’s children. Lord Tywin had laid the bodies beneath the Iron Throne, wrapped in the crimson cloaks of his house guard. That was clever of him; the blood did not show so badly against the red cloth. The little princess had been barefoot, still dressed in her bed gown, and the boy?.?.?.?the boy?.?.?.?
然而昨夜他却梦见了雷加的孩子。泰温公爵将尸首用他侍卫的红披风裹好,放在铁王座下。这么做颇为聪明,因为包着红布,血迹便不太明显。小公主死时光着脚,身上穿着睡衣,而那男孩……那男孩……。
Ned could not let that happen again. The realm could not withstand a second mad king, another dance of blood and vengeance. He must find some way to save the children.
奈德绝不能让类似的事情重演。王国再不能出现第二个丧心病狂的国王,更经不起又一次充满仇恨的腥风血雨。他得想办法保护那几个孩子。
Robert could be merciful. Ser Barristan was scarcely the only man he had pardoned. Grand Maester Pycelle, Varys the Spider, Lord Balon Greyjoy; each had been counted an enemy to Robert once, and each had been welcomed into friendship and allowed to retain honors and office for a pledge of fealty. So long as a man was brave and honest, Robert would treat him with all the honor and respect due a valiant enemy.
劳勃是很可以表现仁慈的人。巴利斯坦爵士并非他惟一舎免的对象。派席尔国师,“八爪蜘蛛”瓦里斯,巴隆•葛雷乔伊……他们个个曾与劳勃为敌,然而一旦宣誓效忠,也都能得到友谊的拥抱,保留自己的荣誉。只要对方表现英勇,行事正直,劳勃便会将他当成勇敢的对手,尊敬有加。
This was something else: poison in the dark, a knife thrust to the soul. This he could never forgive, no more than he had forgiven Rhaegar. He will kill them all, Ned realized.
然而这次情况有别:暗中下毒,背后捅刀,这种事他绝对无法原谅,就像他始终无法原谅雷加。我要教他们像龙一样死得干净彻底,奈德想起劳勃的话。
And yet, he knew he could not keep silent. He had a duty to Robert, to the realm, to the shade of Jon Arryn?.?.?.?and to Bran, who surely must have stumbled on some part of the truth. Why else would they have tried to slay him?
即便如此,他依旧无法保持沉默。他要对劳勃负责,更要对整个国家,对死去的琼恩•艾林……对布兰负责。那孩子肯定是无意之中听见部分事实,否则他们何必杀他灭口?
Late that afternoon he summoned Tomard, the portly guardsman with the ginger-colored whiskers his children called Fat Tom. With Jory dead and Alyn gone, Fat Tom had command of his household guard. The thought filled Ned with vague disquiet. Tomard was a solid man; affable, loyal, tireless, capable in a limited way, but he was near fifty, and even in his youth he had never been energetic. Perhaps Ned should not have been so quick to send off half his guard, and all his best swords among them.
当天傍晚,他把身材粗壮,留着淡黄胡须,被他的孩子们戏称为“胖汤姆”的守卫托马德找来。由于乔里已死,埃林又出门在外,胖汤姆便成了他的侍卫队长。想到这奈德觉得些微不安,托马德是个很可靠的人,待人和蔼可亲,忠心耿耿,不辞辛劳,某些地方还算能干,但他已年近五十,而即使年轻时也算不上精力充沛。或许奈德不该这么轻易地送走半数侍卫,那些可都是他手下最精良的战士。
"I shall require your help," Ned said when Tomard appeared, looking faintly apprehensive, as he always did when called before his lord. "Take me to the godswood."
“我需要你帮忙,”托马德进门时,奈德对他说。胖汤姆每当被主人传唤,总有些惴惴不安,这回也不例外。“扶我去神木林。”
"Is that wise, Lord Eddard? With your leg and all?"
“艾德大人,这样好吗?您脚这个样子……”
"Perhaps not. But necessary."
“或许不好,但我必须这么做。”
Tomard summoned Varly. With one arm around each man’s shoulders, Ned managed to descend the steep tower steps and hobble across the bailey. "I want the guard doubled," he told Fat Tom. "No one enters or leaves the Tower of the Hand without my leave."
托马德叫来瓦利,奈德一手扶一人的肩膀,勉强走下高塔陡峭的楼梯,跛着脚穿过内城。“将守卫班次加倍,”他告诉胖汤姆。“未经我允许,任何人不准进出首相塔。”
Tom blinked. "M’lord, with Alyn and the others away, we are hard-pressed already..."
汤姆眨眨眼。“老爷,眼下少了埃林他们,我们的人手很吃紧——”
"It will only be a short while. Lengthen the watches."
“不用多久。暂时延长值班时间。”
"As you say, m’lord," Tom answered. "Might I ask why..."
“遵命,老爷。”汤姆回答,“我能否询问——”
"Best not," Ned answered crisply.
“最好不要。”奈德立时回答。
The godswood was empty, as it always was here in this citadel of the southron gods. Ned’s leg was screaming as they lowered him to the grass beside the heart tree. "Thank you." He drew a paper from his sleeve, sealed with the sigil of his House. "Kindly deliver this at once."
神木林里空无一人,信仰南方诸神的城堡中,向来如此。等他们在心树旁的草地把他放下,他的脚已经痛得撕心裂肺。“谢谢。”他从袖子里取出一张用家徽印章封好的纸。“麻烦你们立刻把它送去。”
Tomard looked at the name Ned had written on the paper and licked his lips anxiously. "My lord?.?.?.?"
托马德望见奈德写在纸上的名字,不安地舔舔嘴唇。“老爷……”
"Do as I bid you, Tom," Ned said.
“汤姆,你照办就是。”奈德说。
How long he waited in the quiet of the godswood, he could not say. It was peaceful here. The thick walls shut out the clamor of the castle, and he could hear birds singing, the murmur of crickets, leaves rustling in a gentle wind. The heart tree was an oak, brown and faceless, yet Ned Stark still felt the presence of his gods. His leg did not seem to hurt so much.
他不知自己在神木林的静谧中等了多久。这里安详而宁静。厚重的围墙阻隔了城堡里的人马喧腾,他听见虫鸣鸟叫,听见叶子在风中瑟瑟作响。此地的心树是一棵棕色橡木,虽然没有刻脸,但奈德依旧可以感觉他所信仰的无名诸神的存在。脚也似乎不那么痛了。
She came to him at sunset, as the clouds reddened above the walls and towers. She came alone, as he had bid her. For once she was dressed simply, in leather boots and hunting greens. When she drew back the hood of her brown cloak, he saw the bruise where the king had struck her. The angry plum color had faded to yellow, and the swelling was down, but there was no mistaking it for anything but what it was.
日落时分她才姗姗来临,塔楼高墙上的云朵已经披上红霞。她依约独自前来,难得地衣着朴素,只穿了皮靴和绿色猎衣。当她掀开棕色斗篷的兜帽,他看见国王打她的地方。原本怒放的李子色已经褪为黄色,肿也消去,然而她的遭遇依旧一目了然。
"Why here?" Cersei Lannister asked as she stood over him.
“为什么在这里?”瑟曦•兰尼斯特站在他面前,高高在上地问。
"So the gods can see."
“好让天上诸神作见证。”
She sat beside him on the grass. Her every move was graceful. Her curling blond hair moved in the wind, and her eyes were green as the leaves of summer. It had been a long time since Ned Stark had seen her beauty, but he saw it now. "I know the truth Jon Arryn died for," he told her.
她在他身畔的草地坐下,一举一动都优雅异常。她蜷曲的金发在风中轻舞,碧绿双眸一如盛夏的繁叶。奈德•史塔克已有许久不曾见识她的美貌,如今又再度唤起。“我知道琼恩•艾林是为什么死的。”他告诉她。
"Do you?" The queen watched his face, wary as a cat. "Is that why you called me here, Lord Stark? To pose me riddles? Or is it your intent to seize me, as your wife seized my brother?"
“是吗?”王后审视着他的脸,如灵猫一般小心翼翼。“史塔克大人,您就为这把我叫来?跟我猜谜语?还是您想学尊夫人挟持我弟弟一样挟持我?”
"If you truly believed that, you would never have come." Ned touched her cheek gently. "Has he done this before?"
“你真这样以为,就不会来了。”奈德轻轻碰触她脸颊。“他以前打过你吗?”
"Once or twice." She shied away from his hand. "Never on the face before. Jaime would have killed him, even if it meant his own life." Cersei looked at him defiantly. "My brother is worth a hundred of your friend."
“有一两次,”她别过去。“但没打过脸,否则就算是自身难保,詹姆也会跟他拼命。”瑟曦神情挑衅地看着他,“我弟弟胜过你朋友一百倍。”
"Your brother?" Ned said. "Or your lover?"
“你弟弟?”奈德说,“还是你爱人?”
"Both." She did not flinch from the truth. "Since we were children together. And why not? The Targaryens wed brother to sister for three hundred years, to keep the bloodlines pure. And Jaime and I are more than brother and sister. We are one person in two bodies. We shared a womb together. He came into this world holding my foot, our old maester said. When he is in me, I feel?.?.?.?whole." The ghost of a smile flitted over her lips.
“两者都是。”面对真相,她脸上毫无异色。“我们从小就在一起。有何不可?坦格利安家三百年来都是兄妹通婚,以保持血统纯正。詹姆和我不只是姐弟,我们根本是分成两半的同一个生命,我们共享同一子宫。据我们家老师傅说,他托着我的脚方才来到人世。当我俩结合的时候,我才……觉得自己完整。”她的唇上隐约掠过一抹微笑。
"My son Bran?.?.?.?"
“我儿子布兰他……?”
To her credit, Cersei did not look away. "He saw us. You love your children, do you not?"
瑟曦坦然面对,没有回避。“他看见我们在一起。你很爱你的孩子,对不对?”
Robert had asked him the very same question, the morning of the melee. He gave her the same answer. "With all my heart."
团体比武当天早上,劳勃问过他一模一样的问题。他给了她相同的答案。“我全心全意地爱他们。”
"No less do I love mine."
“我也是这么爱着自己的孩子。”
Ned thought, If it came to that, the life of some child I did not know, against Robb and Sansa and Arya and Bran and Rickon, what would I do? Even more so, what would Catelyn do, if it were Jon’s life, against the children of her body? He did not know. He prayed he never would.
奈德心想:倘若换成别的小孩威胁到罗柏、珊莎、艾莉亚、布兰或瑞肯的生命,他会怎么做?甚或,倘若琼恩威胁到她亲生孩子的性命,凯特琳又会怎么办?他不知道,他祈祷自己永远不要知道。
"All three are Jaime’s," he said. It was not a question.
“他们三个都是詹姆的孩子。”他说,这并非提问。
"Thank the gods."
“感谢天上诸神。”
The seed is strong, Jon Arryn had cried on his deathbed, and so it was. All those bastards, all with hair as black as night. Grand Maester Malleon recorded the last mating between stag and lion, some ninety years ago, when Tya Lannister wed Gowen Baratheon, third son of the reigning lord. Their only issue, an unnamed boy described in Malleon’s tome as a large and lusty lad born with a full head of black hair, died in infancy. Thirty years before that a male Lannister had taken a Baratheon maid to wife. She had given him three daughters and a son, each black-haired. No matter how far back Ned searched in the brittle yellowed pages, always he found the gold yielding before the coal.
种性强韧,琼恩•艾林临死前如此大喊,事实的确如此。每一个私生子的头发都漆黑如夜。梅利恩记录了九十多年前雄鹿和狮子间最后一次结合,蒂亚•兰尼斯特嫁给葛文•拜拉席恩——他在本家排行老三。他们惟一的孩子是个无有名字的早夭男婴,梅利恩的书中如此描述:“个头大,食量佳,满头黑发。”再往前三十年,一位兰尼斯特家的男性娶了拜拉席恩家的女孩为妻。她为他生了三个女儿、一个儿子,全部皆为黑发。不管奈德在薄脆的泛黄书页间如何向前追溯,金黄一遇炭黑永远只有屈服的份。
"A dozen years," Ned said. "How is it that you have had no children by the king?"
“你们结婚十多年,”奈德道,“怎么会没有孩子?”
She lifted her head, defiant. "Your Robert got me with child once," she said, her voice thick with contempt. "My brother found a woman to cleanse me. He never knew. If truth be told, I can scarcely bear for him to touch me, and I have not let him inside me for years. I know other ways to pleasure him, when he leaves his whores long enough to stagger up to my bedchamber. Whatever we do, the king is usually so drunk that he’s forgotten it all by the next morning."
她倔傲地抬起头。“你那劳勃让我怀过一次孕,”她的口气充满轻蔑。“我弟弟找了个女人帮我把孩子清理掉。他根本不知道这回事。真要我说,我完全无法忍受他碰我一根汗毛。我们已经很多年没有行房了。他要是稍微远离他那些婊子,喝完酒还能跌跌撞撞地找到我房间,我也有其他方法满足他。反正不管我们做些什么,国王通常烂醉如泥,隔天就忘得一千二净。”
How could they have all been so blind? The truth was there in front of them all the time, written on the children’s faces. Ned felt sick. "I remember Robert as he was the day he took the throne, every inch a king," he said quietly. "A thousand other women might have loved him with all their hearts. What did he do to make you hate him so?"
他们怎能如此盲目?事实从头到尾摆在眼前,清清楚楚写在孩子们的脸上,而他们却视若无睹。奈德觉得一阵反胃。“我记得劳勃初登王位那天的模样,完全是翩翩王者风范。”他静静地说,“成千上万的女人都会全心全意爱他,他到底做了什么,让你恨成这样?”
Her eyes burned, green fire in the dusk, like the lioness that was her sigil. "The night of our wedding feast, the first time we shared a bed, he called me by your sister’s name. He was on top of me, in me, stinking of wine, and he whispered Lyanna."
她的双眼燃起暮色中的绿火,宛如她家徽的母狮。“我们新婚当晚,初次同床共枕,他叫的却是你妹妹的名字。他压在我身上,进到我体内,浑身酒臭,他竟然悄悄念着‘莱安娜’。”
Ned Stark thought of pale blue roses, and for a moment he wanted to weep. "I do not know which of you I pity most."
奈德•史塔克想起碧蓝的玫瑰,一时间只觉泫然欲泣。“我真不知该可怜你还是可怜他。”
The queen seemed amused by that. "Save your pity for yourself, Lord Stark. I want none of it."
王后似乎觉得这话颇为有趣。“史塔克大人,省省力气可怜你自己罢。我不需要。”
"You know what I must do."
“你很清楚我必须怎么做。”
"Must?" She put her hand on his good leg, just above the knee. "A true man does what he will, not what he must." Her fingers brushed lightly against his thigh, the gentlest of promises. "The realm needs a strong Hand. Joff will not come of age for years. No one wants war again, least of all me." Her hand touched his face, his hair. "If friends can turn to enemies, enemies can become friends. Your wife is a thousand leagues away, and my brother has fled. Be kind to me, Ned. I swear to you, you shall never regret it."
“必须怎么做?”她朝他没受伤的脚伸出手,搁在刚过膝盖的地方。“一个真实的人做他想做的事,而不是他必须做的事。”她的手指轻轻拂过他的大腿,带着最温柔的暗示。“离小乔成年还有好些年,国家需要一个强有力的首相。没人想重启战端,我尤其不想。”她的手拂过他的脸庞和头发,“倘若朋友可以反目成仇,我们为何不能化敌为友?尊夫人远在千里之外,我弟弟也不在城中。奈德,对我好一点,我发誓绝不让你后悔。”
"Did you make the same offer to Jon Arryn?"
“你当初也是这么向琼恩•艾林提议吗?”
She slapped him.
她甩了他一个耳光。
"I shall wear that as a badge of honor," Ned said dryly.
“我会把这当成荣誉的奖章。”奈德冷冷地说。
"Honor," she spat. "How dare you play the noble lord with me! What do you take me for? You’ve a bastard of your own, I’ve seen him. Who was the mother, I wonder? Some Dornish peasant you raped while her holdfast burned? A whore? Or was it the grieving sister, the Lady Ashara? She threw herself into the sea, I’m told. Why was that? For the brother you slew, or the child you stole? Tell me, my honorable Lord Eddard, how are you any different from Robert, or me, or Jaime?"
“去你的荣誉,”她啐道,“少给我道貌岸然!你把我当什么了?你自己也有个私生子,我亲眼见过。我很好奇他的母亲是谁?是不是哪个家园被你放火烧掉,随后被你强奸的多恩农家女?还是个婊子?或者是那个哀伤的妹妹,亚夏拉小姐?我听说,当你将拂晓神剑那把‘黎明’送还给她后,她便从城墙投海自尽,这到底是什么缘故啊?是因为被你所杀的哥哥,还是被你偷走的孩子?告诉我啊,最讲究荣誉的艾德大人,你和劳勃,或是我,或是詹姆,究竟有什么差别?”
"For a start," said Ned, "I do not kill children. You would do well to listen, my lady. I shall say this only once. When the king returns from his hunt, I intend to lay the truth before him. You must be gone by then. You and your children, all three, and not to Casterly Rock. If I were you, I should take ship for the Free Cities, or even farther, to the Summer Isles or the Port of Ibben. As far as the winds blow."
“别的不说,”奈德说,“至少我不杀孩子。夫人,请您听好,我话只说一辫。等国王打猎归来,我准备把事情原原本本地告诉他。在这之前你一定得走,带着孩子一起走,三个都带。不要回凯岩城,如果我是你,我会搭船去自由贸易城邦,或是走得更远,到盛夏群岛或伊班港,能跑多远就跑多远。”
"Exile," she said. "A bitter cup to drink from."
“你要我自我放逐,”她说,“这是杯难以下咽的苦酒。”
"A sweeter cup than your father served Rhaegar’s children," Ned said, "and kinder than you deserve. Your father and your brothers would do well to go with you. Lord Tywin’s gold will buy you comfort and hire swords to keep you safe. You shall need them. I promise you, no matter where you flee, Robert’s wrath will follow you, to the back of beyond if need be."
“比起令尊给雷加小孩的那杯,算是好的了,”奈德道,“也比你原本应得的好。令尊和你弟弟最好也能一起走,泰温大人的财产足够让你们过舒服日子,还可以雇人保你们安全。你会需要的。我跟你保证,无论你逃得多远,劳勃的怒火都会尾随而至,追你到天涯海角。”
The queen stood. "And what of my wrath, Lord Stark?" she asked softly. Her eyes searched his face. "You should have taken the realm for yourself. It was there for the taking. Jaime told me how you found him on the Iron Throne the day King’s Landing fell, and made him yield it up. That was your moment. All you needed to do was climb those steps, and sit. Such a sad mistake."
王后站起来。“那我的怒火又怎么办,史塔克大人?”她轻声问,目光在他脸上搜索。“王位近在咫尺,你只需伸手便可夺取天下。詹姆跟我说过,君临城陷那天,你发现他坐在铁王座上,便要求他交出王位。那是你千载难逢的机会,你只需爬上阶梯,坐上王位。可悲啊,可悲的错误。”
"I have made more mistakes than you can possibly imagine," Ned said, "but that was not one of them."
“我这辈子犯过的错,超乎你的想像。”奈德说,“然而这却不是其中之一。”
"Oh, but it was, my lord," Cersei insisted. "When you play the game of thrones, you win or you die. There is no middle ground."
“噢,大人,这当然是,”瑟曦坚持,“在权力的游戏之中,你不当赢家,就只有死路一条,没有中间地带。”
She turned up her hood to hide her swollen face and left him there in the dark beneath the oak, amidst the quiet of the godswood, under a blue-black sky. The stars were coming out.
她拉上兜帽,遮住浮肿的脸,快步离开,留下他独自坐在橡树的阴影下,置身神木林的静谧之中。头顶的黑蓝天空里,星星逐渐出来了。